"Type R" burger with some "VTEC" Sauce

Post by **thrdeye** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 1:12 pm

Could be old, but i haven't seen it. This is funny.

I love my Honda like I love my ganja
I’ll smoke ya v-8 like I smoke marijuana
Back up boy and show some respect
My Honda civic has a 4 cylinder vtec
When I go out people wanna see my ride
They always stare at the "Type R" on the side
I painted my hood black for that carbon fiber look
My windshield wiper lights that off tha f*****n hook
I took off my hubcaps cause they give me better times
When I rip a new track I’m stunnin on my rhymes
My exhaust turned sideways with a 5 inch tip
I raced a z06 and took home his pink slip
I got a new spoiler from J.C. whitney
It's a 15 inch doublestak worth every penny
APC decals and two racing stripes
4 ion blue daytime runiing lights
When I take off tha front tires go up in smoke
And chevy’s with 350’s ain’t nothing but a joke
Went to Pep Boys and bought all the neon lights
Its like Las Vegas when you see me at night
Don’t mess with tha vtec cause it’ll send ya home
Cryin lika fat kid that dropped his ice cream cone
When ya see my comin get outta my way
I gotta cruise tha mall cause you know its Friday
I doing loud fly-bys all down tha highway
Bumping some techno with my visor turned sideways
If you wanna race ya ass will get tossed
I throw in it neutral and rev up the exhaust
I’m gonna leave your ass in a world on pain
My adrenaline rushin with tha rice in my veins
Nutra slam it in drive when the light turns green
And I’ll eat a Saleen like ya momma lean cusine
I got another victory in the "domestic basher"
I’ll pull in front of you and throw on my flashers
When ya lost you called me a cheater
Ya just couldn't hang with the 1.6 liter
Tha Civic is more like a rocket than it is a car
You’ll be sayin to ya self “damn is that a type R”

(Fast & Furious interlude)

Don’t mess with Hondas cause they’re outta ya class
I wait till ya get beside me trying ta pass
Let ya hear tha vtec when I step on tha gas
Next thing ya know your ass is finishin last
I fix you a "Type R" burger with some vtec sauce
You’re ass will be fired cause Honda is tha boss
Is NOT called nitrious tha shit is called called NOS
You should know by now your life is a loss
It’s about time you stop driving all them wrecks
Get a job at hardees and save all ya checks
Or sue KFC for falling on ya neck
And when you get paid buy yourself a Vtec

dfsmith · Post by **dfsmith** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 1:33 pm

That is SOOOOOO wrong! And yet SOOOO right!

mrsoul55 · Post by **mrsoul55** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 1:41 pm

Hey now! Not all Honda drivers are like that. Some can even spell!
I do hate being lumped in with that group though. There are some real punks driving Hondas but I guess that's the case with any car.

steverife · Post by **steverife** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 2:03 pm

mrsoul55 wrote:There are some real punks driving Hondas but I guess that's the case with any car.

nope. just honda

Doug · Post by **Doug** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 3:38 pm

I've not seen any Honda guys on here posting about "gold wheels"!

Post by **thrdeye** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 4:12 pm

I gotz me some 20's foo!

Alright, I lied.

They is 10's..... but I keep em clean.

mrsoul55 · Post by **mrsoul55** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 4:15 pm

I showed this to my wife and now she hates my car even more than she did before!

firingonfour · Post by **firingonfour** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 7:52 pm

I've never seen gold wheels on a honda either, Doug. Subies, Yes. Did they make an automatic V-tec type R? Something in the "lyrics" about neutral and "drive."

Screw street racing, anyway. It's trite but true: "Drag racing is for fast cars, autocross is for fast drivers." The only drag worth watching is the kind where a complete engine rebuild between runs is necessary and the car has a good chance of catching on fire and going into orbit.

Old school hondas rule (i just can't drive), and mufflers are an unnecessary evil.
This concludes my evening honda rant, and further destroys my faith in Hollywood's ability to glamorize something totally lame.
(Please tell me you cut and pasted that garbage...)

EliseAutoXr · Post by **EliseAutoXr** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 8:13 pm

I recently bought some wheels off ebay, they were painted gold... I spent all night before race day with paint stripper to remove it!! Not that my Honda would look bad with gold wheels

... hey! Do I hear hints of jealousy from the NON Honda drivers

Williampreza · Post by **Williampreza** » Sat Aug 14, 2004 6:00 am

SlowS2K wrote: Do I hear hints of jealousy from the NON Honda drivers

thus quoth the Anti-Rice.

EliseAutoXr · Post by **EliseAutoXr** » Sat Aug 14, 2004 8:41 am

My step-son (12yrs old) does not understand why I don't get a black hood, huge aluminum wing, vinyls... oh and huge (20inch) chrome wheels too. What do you guys think?

firingonfour · Post by **firingonfour** » Sat Aug 14, 2004 12:04 pm

It'd be a good way to crap up a nice honda.

EliseAutoXr · Post by **EliseAutoXr** » Sat Aug 14, 2004 12:41 pm

hehe, ya, for some reason he does not see it that way at all. Sadly I'm afraid I can picture the car he will be driving when he is 17/18

... I wonder if there's something I can add to his food to "fix" him???

Williampreza · Post by **Williampreza** » Sat Aug 14, 2004 3:16 pm

Get him autocrossing as soon as he gets a license. He'll eschew all that crap as soon as he figures it out, and he'll might learn what eschew is (especially if he's in SM [well, except for the carbon hood if it saves weight).